Here we are a week later, and very little has actually changed from our pre-hospital routine, aside from a new morning battle with the anti-embolism stockings. I was right in suspecting that a layer of delerium had been added to the mix in the nursing home, and now that it has disappeared my mother has… Continue reading The elephant in the room / November 11, 2006
I don’t particularly enjoy visiting with my mother in the nursing home, but I dislike NOT seeing her even more. I worried for awhile that my presence was having a negative effect on her behavior, until I realized that there is no resolution to that particular worry. Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t–in the end… Continue reading Visits / October 22, 2006
My mother remains hospitalized, and we now know that she has a pulmonary embolism, no doubt the result of Deep Vein Thrombosis. Another reason to keep the legs moving. The good news is that she is doing quite well–she is alert and her skin has color. She’ll probably be in for another couple of days,… Continue reading Transition, part 2 / October 12, 2006
“I have no idea what the day will bring.” That’s how I ended my last post, and the following day, unfortunately, did prove to be memorable. Seven hours in the emergency room with my mother, who had collapsed at 5 that morning. I couldn’t even sit her up, she was so weak, and I had… Continue reading Transition, part 1 / October 10, 2006
The nurse from the assisted living facility visited us last Tuesday to evaluate my mother’s suitability for this type of living. I fretted deeply about this, despite trying to calm myself down by re-examining all my escape hatches (”This doesn’t mean she’ll have to move TOMORROW”, etc.). I eventually realized that my primary worry was… Continue reading Assisted living, part 3 / September 26, 2006
I’d like to repeat a comment that was left for me by Patty Doherty, one of the creators of The Unforgettable Fund. Answering just ONE of her questions requires one to be bravely empathetic. And until the most powerful members of our society can acknowledge and deeply empathize with the least powerful members (note Patty’s challenge,… Continue reading Good stewards, part 1 / September 11, 2006
Several times this past week I’ve heard myself telling someone that my mother would probably be moving into assisted living fairly soon. Each time the words startled me–as if I were hearing someone else saying them. I don’t know when the “if” became “when”–or even if it truly has become “when”–but a part of me… Continue reading Ifs and whens / September 2, 2006
My first Aid & Attendance post received the following comment, which is definitely worth repeating here: Hey Deb, I read your post about trying to get VA benefits, and thought you mightlike to know about www.GovBenefits.gov. It’s the official benefits Website of the US Government and provides information on more than 1,000programs including scholarships. The site also… Continue reading Aid & Attendance, part 2 / August 11, 2006
I’ve been trying to describe to myself what causes me stress these days. If I can identify the factors, maybe I can manage some of them? [she wondered hopefully]. I don’t know when I began to think of stress as something like smog–diffuse and unavoidable. I guess it is, but nevertheless, it originates somewhere–either in… Continue reading Stress, part 1 / July 17, 2006
Today my sister and I visited an assisted living residence, the first of at least four that we’ll visit. I’m learning as I go along. I did quite a bit of research beforehand but there’s nothing like the experience of walking into a place and imagining your parent living there. I actually felt sick about… Continue reading Assisted living, part 1 / June 20, 2006
